The first part of a 5 part series on Show Not Tell
In my critiques I use the symbol TnS to indicate an instance where the author is telling the reader about something instead of showing.
As a writer, how many times have you heard or given this advice—likely more times than you’d care to remember—but treasure the advice because not only is it easy to miss opportunities to “show,” it will enhance your story 100-fold. Here’s some tips to keep in mind while planning or writing your next piece:
1. Use precise description by picturing every detail of the scene in your mind. If your character is using a hand gesture, picture it, or better yet, imitate it yourself—over and over until you can describe it succinctly.
e.g./ Mavis looked at each page of the diary; it had to be in here somewhere.
Mavis wet her fingertip and flipped page by page through the diary . . .
NB: don’t describe peripheral objects, if the object doesn’t play a role or have a place in your story—omit it!
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Self-publishing Success Story
What book of Christian fiction:
—hit the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association Bestsellers List in March 2008
—edged out Max Lucado's 3:16 for #1 position on the ECPA Bestseller list in April
—continues to hold #1 position on Amazon's bestseller list in Christian fiction
—is #8 overall on the Amazon Bestseller list
—has sold over 400 000 copies
—is published by Windblown Media
—is authored by William P. Young?
No traditional publisher would touch the now best-selling novel The Shack by 53-year-old William Paul Young, but after he self-published it, it rose to and held Amazon.com's No. 1 spot in fiction about religion and spirituality for weeks. The book he wrote for his children has now sold close to 400,000 copies.
The book is a parable in which God is depicted as an overweight African-American woman who is almost constantly at the stove cooking. Churches buy his book by the box.
Young, until his book became a recent phenomenon, had a job as an office manager that also included cleaning toilets at a small sales company in Oregon. Just before he started writing The Shack, he and his wife Kim lost their home to foreclosure, and spent several years living with four of their six children in a 900-square-foot rental.
Young says he wrote the book for his children, at the urging of his wife, and printed a few spiral bound copies to give as gifts during Christmas 2005. He also e-mailed copies to a few friends, who, in turn, e-mailed their friends. Soon, Young was hearing from readers around the country.
In the wake of the publishing house rejections, Young and two friends started a company called Windblown Media to print and sell the book. Their advertising budget was $300.
Excerpt from The Southern Review, May 2008
—hit the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association Bestsellers List in March 2008
—edged out Max Lucado's 3:16 for #1 position on the ECPA Bestseller list in April
—continues to hold #1 position on Amazon's bestseller list in Christian fiction
—is #8 overall on the Amazon Bestseller list
—has sold over 400 000 copies
—is published by Windblown Media
—is authored by William P. Young?
No traditional publisher would touch the now best-selling novel The Shack by 53-year-old William Paul Young, but after he self-published it, it rose to and held Amazon.com's No. 1 spot in fiction about religion and spirituality for weeks. The book he wrote for his children has now sold close to 400,000 copies.The book is a parable in which God is depicted as an overweight African-American woman who is almost constantly at the stove cooking. Churches buy his book by the box.
Young, until his book became a recent phenomenon, had a job as an office manager that also included cleaning toilets at a small sales company in Oregon. Just before he started writing The Shack, he and his wife Kim lost their home to foreclosure, and spent several years living with four of their six children in a 900-square-foot rental.
Young says he wrote the book for his children, at the urging of his wife, and printed a few spiral bound copies to give as gifts during Christmas 2005. He also e-mailed copies to a few friends, who, in turn, e-mailed their friends. Soon, Young was hearing from readers around the country.
In the wake of the publishing house rejections, Young and two friends started a company called Windblown Media to print and sell the book. Their advertising budget was $300.
Excerpt from The Southern Review, May 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
EXCLAIMING!
!
We who write e-mail attempt to infuse a little emotion using exclamation marks! At the end of every sentence we seem so excited! For those who communicate from their computer, exclamation points are the most overused form of punctuation! After seeing just a few, exclamation points lose all impact for readers! Mentally they become commonplace, equivalent to periods, and are boring! See what I mean! Is that annoying, or what!
Then there is the opposite mistake.
Stephen King wrote a book called On Writing. In it, he advises to never use exclamation points. Deborah Collins-Smith, a co-contributor in the Light at the Edge of Darkness anthology (Fumbleblot's Task and The Rider), edited a book for an English as a second language author who took this advice. In it there was a scene wherein a mother gave birth. As she cried out in the delivery room, everything ended in a period! Can you imagine? "Ow. That hurts so bad. Shut up Dr., I am pushing. Oh, there's my baby. What a beautiful child."
This is a fine line to walk, and one that requires a sense of propriety! I cut the number of sentences ending in exclamation points in half in my many edits of Flashpoint: Book One of the Underground!
Exercise much caution in using exclamation points!
Don't wear out their welcome.
We who write e-mail attempt to infuse a little emotion using exclamation marks! At the end of every sentence we seem so excited! For those who communicate from their computer, exclamation points are the most overused form of punctuation! After seeing just a few, exclamation points lose all impact for readers! Mentally they become commonplace, equivalent to periods, and are boring! See what I mean! Is that annoying, or what!
Then there is the opposite mistake.
Stephen King wrote a book called On Writing. In it, he advises to never use exclamation points. Deborah Collins-Smith, a co-contributor in the Light at the Edge of Darkness anthology (Fumbleblot's Task and The Rider), edited a book for an English as a second language author who took this advice. In it there was a scene wherein a mother gave birth. As she cried out in the delivery room, everything ended in a period! Can you imagine? "Ow. That hurts so bad. Shut up Dr., I am pushing. Oh, there's my baby. What a beautiful child."
This is a fine line to walk, and one that requires a sense of propriety! I cut the number of sentences ending in exclamation points in half in my many edits of Flashpoint: Book One of the Underground!
Exercise much caution in using exclamation points!
Don't wear out their welcome.
Monday, April 7, 2008
A Frank Rant on the Rules of Writing
The books I’ve read on how-to-write-fiction dwell entirely too much on the old cliché: the only rule to writing is that there are no rules.
Poppycock. This is confusing, and on the surface, inaccurate. What it means is in the process of finding one’s voice, one must learn the rules of writing so one knows when to break the rules.
If the Boss has gifted you with a proprietary literary eye, I’ve never found a good writer who can’t master the craft with the following critique-key. These are the most common points of criticism I find in evaluating manuscripts for thefinishers.biz.
C = Cliché: clichés may be used in dialogue for your characters who speak that way, but nowhere else.
WV = Weak Verbage: Use was and were only when you must. Always use a root word when possible—it’s strongest. -ed endings are second choice, -ing is last choice.
PoV = Point of View: The rules of PoV are all over the Web—just Google it. Remember it’s bad form to go jumping through characters’ heads, revealing their thoughts in the same scene.
Q = Qualifier: Use Words like just and really, very, and sometimes deliberately. Which of the following sentences is stronger: "Qualifiers just really sometimes weaken." or "Qualifiers weaken."
! = over exclaiming: A weakness of the written word is lack of voice inflection. In order to inject a little life into e-mail and blogs, people have gotten used to using exclaimation points. When there are too many in fiction, they end up losing impact. Save these for when you really need them.
TnS = Telling, not Showing: Don’t say "She looked worried". Describe body language and facial expressions. "She winced, closed her eyes, and slumped as though her backpack on the table still weighted her shoulders."
CoS = Cognitive or Sensory: words like thought, wondered, remembered, heard, saw, tasted, etc. It’s stronger to simply state a character’s perceptions rather than include the cumbersome words that inform readers what they already know. Simply state/ describe action. Which is stronger: "Joe looked down the hall to see the man with the gun." or "The peacekeeper aimed the Ak-47 at Joe."
These simple tips can make a huge difference in your fiction. Writers are delighted to see what thefinishers.biz can do with a manuscript. We’ve pooled some great talent for literary and theological criticism, editing, and proofreading. If you have a manuscript that needs a final polish, contact us through the link at thefinishers.biz and His will be done.
Poppycock. This is confusing, and on the surface, inaccurate. What it means is in the process of finding one’s voice, one must learn the rules of writing so one knows when to break the rules.
If the Boss has gifted you with a proprietary literary eye, I’ve never found a good writer who can’t master the craft with the following critique-key. These are the most common points of criticism I find in evaluating manuscripts for thefinishers.biz.
C = Cliché: clichés may be used in dialogue for your characters who speak that way, but nowhere else.
WV = Weak Verbage: Use was and were only when you must. Always use a root word when possible—it’s strongest. -ed endings are second choice, -ing is last choice.
PoV = Point of View: The rules of PoV are all over the Web—just Google it. Remember it’s bad form to go jumping through characters’ heads, revealing their thoughts in the same scene.
Q = Qualifier: Use Words like just and really, very, and sometimes deliberately. Which of the following sentences is stronger: "Qualifiers just really sometimes weaken." or "Qualifiers weaken."
! = over exclaiming: A weakness of the written word is lack of voice inflection. In order to inject a little life into e-mail and blogs, people have gotten used to using exclaimation points. When there are too many in fiction, they end up losing impact. Save these for when you really need them.
TnS = Telling, not Showing: Don’t say "She looked worried". Describe body language and facial expressions. "She winced, closed her eyes, and slumped as though her backpack on the table still weighted her shoulders."
CoS = Cognitive or Sensory: words like thought, wondered, remembered, heard, saw, tasted, etc. It’s stronger to simply state a character’s perceptions rather than include the cumbersome words that inform readers what they already know. Simply state/ describe action. Which is stronger: "Joe looked down the hall to see the man with the gun." or "The peacekeeper aimed the Ak-47 at Joe."
These simple tips can make a huge difference in your fiction. Writers are delighted to see what thefinishers.biz can do with a manuscript. We’ve pooled some great talent for literary and theological criticism, editing, and proofreading. If you have a manuscript that needs a final polish, contact us through the link at thefinishers.biz and His will be done.
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